#9 The power of delicacy
A couple of days ago I read a letter by Carmen Pacheco, in which she spoke about delicacy. That force that, without the need of touch, transforms. She gave the example of a dermoscopy that she had to go through. How the doctor, almost without touching her arm and with profound delicacy, indicated the movements she should carry out. Most of us will know that tactile experience of delicate touch. An experience that has nothing to do with intimacy and much to do with the appreciation and the dignity of another person. And, ultimately, deep respect. The power of that touch can almost feel like a mystical experience. Because when you live such a moment, you are at peace. It may be brief, but in that moment, you are at peace with the world.
According to the RAE, delicacy is attention and exquisite regard for people or things, in actions and/or words.
Some people have innate delicacy. An exquisite regard for others, whether through words, gestures or actions. The knowledge of how to act in completely different situations. People who, by interacting with us, transmit us peace and calmness.
But delicacy is not only reserved to people. It can be found in some works of art. In Bernini's sculptures, in Stefan Zweig's writing, in works by Bach, in paintings by Teresa Cuevas. Artworks in which it is clear that each curve, each brushstroke, each note and word have been placed with the utmost delicacy and care. With a lot of attention.
One thing that worries me a lot is the growing lack of delicacy. The lack of respect for others, often overlooked with a simple I am like this or I'm just being honest. No. It's one thing, to be honest and name things by their true nature and a completely different thing to not care at all for the other person. But it is no longer only in the way of speaking but in how we treat and interact with each other. How fast the dignity of a person is completely overlooked, and how people are treated as if they were objects and not human beings.
Delicacy is not submission, it is not following rigid social norms, it is not a feminine quality, and it is not playing a role and rejecting one's character. Delicacy is a universal quality. It is appreciation, and it is respect.
The delicacy in the touch, in the look, in the attitude towards others and towards life is nothing more than an expression of our interior. Of our self-regard. Of how we value our own life and how dear we hold ourselves. In a world where delicacy is no longer present, everything can be considered lost. But in a world where the care for others, the attention, the consideration and the appreciation of people (and of nature) prevail with great force, everything is possible.
A book
There comes a point in life when we find a book that becomes our book. The book, that contains everything we look for in a story and that touches us very deeply. As a result, we begin to see life in a previously unexplored way. For me, that book is The Awakening of Miss Prim by Natalia Sanmartín Fenollera. At first, I was not very convinced. It seemed to me that something was missing, that there was a lack of something. But with each new rereading (and there have already been many) I discover new hidden treasures. It is a book of profound delicacy and subtlety. Of great elegance and erudition. Qualities that I value and appreciate very much. I know this book is not for everyone, but it is a book that everyone should try reading. There will be a reader who says that it is a book for women. Well no, I can assure you that, if you read in-depth and with time, you will see that this is not the case.
So seek beauty, Miss Prim. Seek it in silence, in tranquillity; seek it in the middle of the night and at dawn. Pause to close doors while you seek it, and don't be surprised if it doesn't reside in museums or in palaces. Don't be surprised if, in the end, you find beauty to be not in Something but Someone.
An Instagram account
That of the artist Teresa J Cuevas, @teresa_j_cuevas. An architect turned painter, whose works have always given me a lot of serenity and peace. Simplicity and elegance. Beauty.
Happiness in less than 140 characters
Peace.
A video
This video went viral a few months ago, but it continues to astonish me every time I watch it. Not only because of the power of music, which manages to overcome any barrier. Even the impediments of such an aggressive disease as Alzheimer's. But also because of what dance means and does to people. To the soul. And how, in this current time, I miss it very much.
This is it for today. I would love to know what you think about delicacy.
I wish you a blessed Sunday.
Keep safe. I will write to you soon.